Saturday, March 29, 2008

Response - Ability

What response-abilities do men have regarding sexualized violence?

We are very interested in ideas about response-ability, and before we consider these ideas, we would like to explore the practices for disseminating these ideas to men.

Why focus on the disseminating practices before the ideas themselves? We think an awareness of and preferences for different types of disseminating practices will have an effect on what ideas we take up. We are convinced that the disseminating practices create certain ideas, give them credibility, and allow the ideas to exist without reference to practical contexts. These practical contexts have very real effects that influence whether men will take up the ideas willingly or by trickery or force.

We prefer to invite men to consider their own self-interests related to response-abilities. When men act in their own self-interests, the ideas they take up and act upon have deep roots and staying power.

We are not worried by self-interests. We do not think of self-interests as "selfish." We experience the self in relationship with others and know that "self" does not exist in a vacuum. An "individualized self" may be worrisome in ways that a "relational self" is not. Self-interests in relationship cannot help but be influenced by other-interests and interests in others.

How do you get men to examine their self-interests in ways that surface the values, beliefs, preferences and practices that would include response-ability?

Invitation and opportunity.

Trickery and force have limited effectiveness. Their influence is at best shallow and temporary. Upon discovery or recognition, they create anger, resentment and defensiveness. They create a kind of relationship violence that is isomorphic to the practices "corrected."

So instead of disseminating our own ideas about men's response-abilities, we are interested in your ways of eliciting from them their own ideas. In another posting we'll be asking for men's personal ideas. Here we are interested in your organizing and group efforts.

What kind of invitations do you extend to men? What kind of opportunities do you create that men can be interested in? How do you get their attention and their interested collaboration?

Friday, March 21, 2008

The New Walk a Mile Blog

Oh, look! Here's the official Walk a Mile in Her Shoes® Blog.

Why a Walk a Mile Blog?

To keep the conversation going. Now that we've got your attention with thousands of men literally walking one mile in high heeled shoes to show their investment in ending sexualized violence, we want to keep you talking. And we're hoping your talking leads to actions, actions that can make the world not just a safer place, but a more enjoyable place for everyone.

Ending sexualized violence cannot be a one–time demonstration. It cannot be a one-time statement. Men must make decisions daily about how they want to show up in the world, about how they want to be in relationship with women and children and other men. Men must make decisions daily about the relationship they will take to sexualized violence.

Will they turn a blind eye? Will they blame the victim? Will they minimize the impact of sexualized violence?

Will they take a stand with the ways they think and speak and act?

Will they take this stand for themselves individually? Will they take this stand on behalf of their family or friends? Will they take this stand on behalf of their community?

How will they and others know they've taken a stand?

Let's find out.